Beautiful Disaster Blog Feature

I am grateful for the opportunity to be featured on Beautiful Disasters blog. Below is a screenshot of half the story as well as the link if you’d like to check out the full story. I hope you all have a fun and safe weekend. I also hope that everyone is enjoying the holiday season.

Love, D

Beautiful Disaster Blog

If I can live through this, I can do anything… -Fall Out Boy

Hey You, Yeah You

Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed…

Why wait for the perfect time to say what’s on your mind, to say what’s in your heart when “perfect timing” doesn’t exist…

Why wait to begin checking off your bucket list, to live your best life…

Why wait to build your passion into a career, to embed your mark into this world…

Why wait to take a deep breath and jump, to take a chance…

Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed…

So, speak loudly and lovingly…go big and bright.

I find it hard to say the things I want to say the most, find a little bit of steady as I get close, find a balance in the middle of the chaos… -Imagine Dragons

More Than a Word

Thankful…this is a word that all too often we don’t express enough, a word that we pull forward with some action during this time of year, but then file it in the back of our minds once the holiday season has come to an end. After the new year has begun we shift back into this state of aggression, we’re back to honking like mad men on the freeway during rush hour traffic…we’re back to complaining that we spent 10 minutes in line to get our coffee or that the price of gas is too high. The fact that you have a car, a job, money to buy that coffee and that gas becomes lost in the chaos of life.

I, myself, have always been a simple chick. Life has thrown me into multiple storms which has led me to always be grateful..not just for surviving the storms, but for the storms themselves. A sense of gratitude, of being thankful for what you have in life, for the people in your life was one of the most important lessons my parents taught me growing up. As I grew older that lesson went beyond having good manners and saying “thank you”, it grew from a word to a realism.

Life is about making it your own and creating so many memories that when you’re an adorably wrinkly 87 year old remenicsing with your partner that you can’t remember every adventure, but you definitely remember that you lived your life. This past year alone I’ve gone to the movies and out to eat with family and friends, I have gone to a couple of concerts, published a book and am close to publishing another, I’ve had adventures at the beach, perused bookstores and of course been at the coffee shops. Every day that I am given, every opportunity that life offers me…I am truly thankful for all of it.

However, that sense of thankfulness runs much deeper when my heart sinks as I witness block after block of homeless men, women, children and Vetrens setting up their makeshift tents for the night down in L.A.. My heart breaks when I see teenagers on street corners with signs asking for food. To know that there are over 100,000 kids in the system, to know that 1 in 4 kids goes without food. This puts knots in my stomach.

See, the fact that you have a place to call home, a car to transport you places or money to purchase necessities and wants isn’t an attachment of life, they’re privileges. The fact that I am sitting on a comfy couch, writing this blog on my laptop while watching Beat Bobby Flay and sipping a coffee are all privileges. The fact that it is 62* outside and I’m surrounded by walls and a roof, dressed in warm clean clothes are privileges. Privileges that I am so grateful for and I wish that everyone had the same… I wish that no one went without a home, clean warm clothes, food, hot water.

Perhaps rush hour traffic, waiting 10 minutes in line or gas prices really aren’t that horrible. Maybe we can work on taking that sense of being thankful beyond November and December, take it into all the 12 months of the year. Maybe we can focus more on having gratitude for the small comforts in life instead of allowing them to be taken for granted. Maybe we can do more to help those less fortunate by donating to a cause, buying a meal for that hungry person on the corner, giving whatever spare change or even a few bucks without judgement, lend a helping hand. Show compassion and kindness towards everyone.

Remember, we are all human and you are no better than anyone else. Money and materialistic gains doesn’t place you on a higher pedestal than the homeless man on the street.

Help a fellow human…human kindness.

Thankful, it’s more than just a word.

Uninspired Walking Billboard

I’ve been trying to write this blog for a few days now. Thoughts were jotted down then frustratingly crossed out. The last week of October is EB Awareness week. Seven days where factual posts and personal stories are trending with the attached hashtags. In the past years I have posted blogs(such as I’m Only Human) and videos, I’ve shared medical facts/ statistics along with my personal story.

However, this year I am at a loss as what to write about. The feeling of repetition is screwing with my thoughts. In a sense, I feel as though I am obligated to represent, obligated to post and share. This obligation is somewhat stressful these days, it has taken over who I am. This weight is suffocating…

Yes, I have EB, but it is a low level of intensity and only one part of my life. EB isn’t the defining definition of what my life is or who I am. EB doesn’t own me, yet this life of living as a walking billboard has sucked up any existing inspiration.

Being that billboard is a heavy weight to carry, that obligation extends out to not wanting to let others down by not posting awareness themed posts like the Mad Hatter. See, I don’t want to let anyone down, but if I were to post just to post then that uninspired disconnect would glow vividly within my words. This equation is crushing my internal world.

I’m so sorry that the content of this blog isn’t what you expected or want.

I’m tired of tending to this fire, I’ve used up all I’ve collected, I have singed my hands… -Twenty One Pilots

Generation Wise

Reminiscing the lessons taught while planting colorful life into the garden…

Reminiscing the wisdom embedded into every drop of ink that resides behind my right ear…

Remember, that while one should work hard building their career, remember to take time to have fun. For when you’re 80, sitting on your front porch sipping on that iced tea, you want to have endless memories not endless regret…

Reminiscing every time I dug too far inside my head as the doctors chose their choice of scalpel, yet you were there to calm my young mental anxiety…

Reminiscing trips to the beach. Every sun filled day and bonfire filled sunset. Sand, ocean and family. The place I said farewell to you, the place I go to talk to you…

Reminiscing the times spent sneaking off to the “hardware store” to enjoy a scoop of butter pecan…

Reminiscing holidays, tutoring my mind with Algebra and your date nut pinwheel Christmas cookies…

Remembering that day you left this planet, an illness riddled body that Cancer attacked while Parkinson’s shook your bones…

Remembering the angered tears that drained from my broken heart as the family said their goodbyes…

Now, today…eleven years and I take today to pay tribute to you, a legend that was my best friend…

A life lived as a Son..Brother..Friend..Soldier in the Navy..Husband..Father..Businessman..Grandfather..Wise Legend.

Find your grandparents or someone of age, pay some respect for the path that they paved..for life they were dedicated, now that should be celebrated…

-Twenty One Pilots

September 29th, 2018

If I was allotted only one word to describe the other night, that word would be Epic.

This world we live in is torn between love and hate, there hasn’t been a balance in quite some time. Just as we were getting to that place of celebrating our differences, that place of common courtesy and acceptance…the world went into a dark spin causing a split chain reaction.

However, an event occured on Saturday, September 29th, 2018 that placed thousands of people under one roof for one purpose and one purpose only…

To rock their little beating hearts out…to soak in that reminder that we are all car crashed hearts.

For 4 hours, age…race…careers…body type…gender…sexual orientation…disabilities…Non of these statuses mattered.

The beats soothed any pain while the lyrics stitched every broken piece.

Every look was met with a smile and every interaction met with kindness.

Every body jumped and danced while every voice sang until their lungs gave out.

On Saturday, September 29th, 2018… everyone was equal.

Long live the car crashed hearts crying on the couch while the poets come to life, fix me in forty-five… -Fall Out Boy

Smile

You see me smile…

We pass one another on the street, make eye contact and exchange a friendly smile…

You catch me at a restaurant enjoying a bite to eat with my friends, laughter and smiles are rolling…

At the theater you see me hanging with my Ma’, busting up at the latest blockbuster comedy…

At the coffee shop, you walk in and take a quick glance my way. I’m on my laptop or phone and a grin makes an appearance on my face…

Family time spent soaking in those vitamin-d rays while waves crash. A sunset bonfire crackling and memories relived in tears of joy. I crack a smirk.

A smile is a tricky feature…it is a double agent. A smile can be genuine in one moment and act as a mask in another. Pain, depression, anxiety…these mental monsters reside behind the smile.

The tricky part…it’s almost impossible to tell the difference between the two.

You see me smile…

I’ve got troubled thoughts and the self esteem to match, what a catch… -Fall Out Boy