Novocain

My dark corner…this is my comfort zone. These silky black skies silhouette the *66 breeze beautifully. Hoodie, caffeine, MGK vibrating through these Beats and the WordPress app in full glow. A gorgeous ending to a productive day.

In the past two weeks I have had two seperate projects in play, one book just released and my second manuscript approved for production. Never in my brightly lit dreams did I ever imagine that my writing was good enough for the world to read and here I find myself overwhelmed with these endless possibilities. Never in my past life did the thought “you’re good enough” enter my probee mind. A mere singular lightbulb flickered in this mechanical mind of mine, now that single bulb has multiplied. An ocean of crystal clear dreams illuminate this dark corner of mine.

Nightmare induced slumber remains to exsist as the Sandman pops in for a quick visit. Trapped in this plexiglass cell, lost within these familiar woods. Punching, kicking and screaming have yet to aid in my escape. The only change of scenery, surprisingly, is you. The looped continuation before I wake in a cold sweat is our eyes connecting. I place my hand on the cold visible cell wall then…

Damn, not again… 

Why are you here in my nightmare? This is not a place where you belong, it’s not safe.

I wish that I could decode the hidden message that’s underlining this nightmare. Maybe I already know, but because I haven’t faced this fear of mine this hell plays over and over like my favorite horror movie that’s tainted with clowns. 

All I want is to escape this indestructible cell. All I want is you. Now, how the hell do I do this? 

“Heart is broken, love unspoken…” – Blink 182

One by one these sunlight dreams are beaming bright. One by one these infinite nightmares are taunting in the most sinister fashion. The only peaceful moment is when I see your handsome face. You are my Novocain.

PS… If you end up reading this, Hi. 

SOTD: Bad Things by MGK.

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